Often we don’t face up to what we fear. We try to hide it in the bottom of our minds, so that perhaps we don’t even know what we are afraid of, or are worrying about. It is important to find out exactly what we are afraid of and also try to understand the starting point of fear. There may be a particular time, or event, which started it off.
Then here are some ideas to help you look at the problem.
1. Facing up to it
Sometimes when you face up to the problem, it doesn’t seem so bad. Sometimes, the fear of something is worse that the thing itself! Perhaps tomorrow, the problem may seem less! Remember, “Today is the tomorrow that you spend your time worrying about yesterday.”
2. Talk to someone
This always helps. Find someone you can trust and share how you feel. In some culture, this is more difficult than others. You will probably find they have had a similar experience and can help you.
3. Look at yourself
Are you one life’s worries? Your character or family upbringing may make you worry easily. But learn to change negative ways of thinking. There are two ways of looking at the cup of water. The negative way says, “the cup is half empty”. But the positive way about the same cup says, “the cup is half full” OK it is difficult. What we actually need is a new mind, that thinks differently but yes, this is possible! see later.
Read more: Why Self-Esteem is so important
4. See more common sense ideas
Don’t worry about things at night, or in bed
Do get good food and exercise
Try and get out of your usual surroundings go somewhere else
Get involved in things which take your mind off worries particularly do things that will help other people in some way
Fear and worries will grow bigger if you don’t deal with them
Do talk others
If fears and worry are affecting your health or leading to depression see a doctor.
Read more: Ten Principles for Managing Problems Positively
5. Are we alone
Many of these problems results from us feeling alone in this world. We feel out of control of our lives at the mercy of so many things.
What we need is a someone or something bigger than problems or worries. A friend who could make it all right. Someone to turn to at anytime.
Ways to overcome Fear
Face the Truth:
Nobody is free from fear. We are all afraid of something or someone at different moments of life. So we share a common emotion. Yet like drug addicts and alcoholic we do not wish to admit it and try to pacify ourselves that there is no problem. Once we admit to ourselves that we are overcome by fear we make peace with ourselves and become free to find an answer to our problem.
Analyse your fear:
- Ask yourself the following questions:
- What am I afraid of and why?
- What are the consequences of my fear?
- What can I possibly do about it?
Don’t be perfect:
Your superiors expect you to be perfect, so you expect yourself and others to be perfect. After all nobody is perfect except God. In our urge to be perfect, we suffer in anticipate of possible failure and therefore avoid making any attempt. The greater the expectation, the greater the disappointment. So don’t be perfect. Just be your best. That’s excellence.
Fight your weakness:
This is an age to fall easy prey to temptations particularly of negligence and indiscipline. If you become vulnerable, rember there are people waiting to take advantage of your weakness and use you for their own selfish objectives. It is your opportunity now to discipline your self and seek guidance on setting clear objectives about your career and your future.
Have faith in God:
It is said that “More things are wrought by prayer that the world dreams of”. In times of distress, offer your feelings in prayer to God he will take away your fears and set you free. Make prayer your steeting wheel and not your spare wheel.
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